My relationship is complicated, unless...

It's the relationship between me and my dog

You're okay with the 'no sex' part

We're in Arkansas

polygamy is legal here

I come out of the closet

I've found my soul mate

it's my relationship with ice cream

I'm easy

It's just me, my hand and a bottle of lotion

I pay by the hour

I'm dating the village idiot

I divorce my stepson

the thirty-year difference in our ages doesn't matter

The DNA results prove she's not my sister.

I file for divorce

I'm over-analysing

wait, what did she tell you?

you finally give me that divorce

I'm a narcissist

I end my extra-marital affair.

The mirror breaks

I don't marry my brother

I'm a loner and only relate to myself

I didn't bother to change my Facebook relationship status.

you don't mind sheep

she's out of town

I stop sleeping with my brother

he's approved for that big life insurance policy...

Neither of us are all that bright

I act like an adult

no-one finds out.

race, gender, age and ethnicity don't matter

You're Adam and you still have all your ribs.

I'm single

we stop having break-up sex

You are married to your work

We move to a small Greek Island where life is simple

I have exact change for her

you don't count my inlaws

society loosens up about those dang taboos!

That's not an option on Facebook

My left hand doesn't know what my right hand is doing.

It's my relationship with food

I'm dating a Blonde

I marry my wife's, cousins, sisters aunt!

it was an arranged marriage

my imaginary friend starts talking back

my mom simply loves me no matter what.

I am in a coma and it's serious.

I can figure out what the hell's going on

my mom/aunt ever divorces my dad/brother. Right grandma/grandpa?

(A) I'm hungry (B) I'm Horny (C) I'm sleepy ...................Pick one.

I'm just idding myself

There is no relationship; I made it all up

I stop thinking and just do it

my lover is 100% compliant

someone can solve the time travel problem of not accidentally fathering yourself

I'm smart enough not to be in a relationship!

My therapist can help me untangle the mess

It can be simplified to a constant

We keep it strictly professional

I'm an analytical freak, so it's perfect!

It's only my Facebook post

I just dump her already

it's our relationship

it's not a relationship anymore

The relationship is 1+1=2

He's still alive

it's all one sided

we're "Facebook official"

all we do is KISS (keep it simple, stupid)

YOU'RE in it...no, really...

I am still single!

I hack your phone and emails, GPS track you, watch your house, kill your wife...

it does not exist

It's with Hugh Hefner. Wait...

f*ck you, die means he wants to break up

my girlfriend is dying

it's by the book

I realize it's all in my head

You are looking through "Rose Colored Glasses"

you unredstand 'for f**k's sake'